Saturday, August 27, 2011

Just so you know,

 I have trouble sharing my feelings on my blog because I know there are many people in the world who have it way worse than me, but I will tell you a little bit about how I feel anyway and show you pictures of sexy people on bikes. We live in Salt Lake City now.  I thought that after living in Europe, I would be less wanderlustful, but my addiction has just been made worse.  I really miss the Spanish/European pace of life and how stores weren't open 24 hours. When there was a holiday,we would have to prepare for it the day before because the store would be closed. I swear there was one month where there was a holiday every single week.  I kind of like not having everything available to me all the time.   BUT, I would like it if more things would be in olive oil, like sun-dried tomatoes and olives. Why would you ever put sun-dried tomatoes and olives in sunflower oil,Whole Foods,Smith's, and Sunflower Market!? I guess I could buy a bag of sun-dried tomatoes and put them in olive oil myself, but I like to buy from the prepared food section sometimes. 

Back to my boring baby-wah wah feelings, I walk around and ride my bike in Salt Lake City and it's very pretty, but it's not the same. I think things will be better when it's not so hot outside and we have more paychecks, but it seems like the only people who walk and bike where I live are homeless. Why aren't there thousands of bikes around like Amsterdam and why isn't there a Chino (convenience store) ten feet away from my apartment?  Why do I live in the same building as a scary schizophrenic lady that shouts,screams, and scares the shit out of me every time I walk into my apartment building? I also miss teaching little Spanish children very much. My new hotel job is so unrewarding that I've volunteered at Ballet West to feel better. I guess that is a good thing.  Do you need a hotel discount? It's easier than ever, I only have to email you the discount.

There IS something really wonderful about being in Salt Lake, besides my recent obsession with genealogy and being next to the genealogy center of the world. It's that I have the most amazing friends! Coming back from Spain, we haven't had very much money and without asking, these lovely friends have been beyond generous and helped us in a million ways, from letting us borrow a french press-to giving us a bed frame-to having us with open arms in their home for a few nights-to even letting us borrow their car! 
Thank you wonderful friends! I don't deserve any of it!  I'm still finding euro cents mixed in with my laundry and my pennies and nickels, but I think I'm starting to feel normal.  I'm also very thankful for my family and my best (internet & California) friends for sending me postcards, sweet facebook messages,blog comments, and texts.   Thanks for understanding and supporting me after my overseas traveling spree/European Vacation.

photos from: 1 Garance Dore 2/3/4 The Sartorialist

17 comments:

stephanie joy said...

Just so you know- I love posts like this where you share things about yourself (but, honestly, I would!). Do it more often I say! Transitions are never fun, but it sounds like you are figuring it out and thriving!

Amy Beatty said...

I would be crying myself to sleep very night too after such a lovely life away. Maybe we could meet up. I'll ride my bike and you on yours and we will just see where have way is..... Ikea, point of the mountain? What hotel are you at? Glad you are back even if your sad!!! When should we get our chocolate?! You thought I forgot, never. My car is on it's death bed but I can borrow my honeys and pick you up! Love you xo

Rachel said...

Thank you for your comments. I already feel really weird for posting my spoiled feelings. I sound so annoying, I think. @Amy we should meet up! I'm working at the downtown Marriott as an AM room service server. It's good to be making money, but I don't really like it.

Elizabeth said...

I was feeling that way after 2 weeks in Europe, I can't imagine what it must be like for you!

I hope you start feeling better soon, but I can understand how it's hard. I'm trying to figure out how to get myself to Europe for a somewhat long period of time, because there are so many things, but especially the more relaxed lifestyle, that I can't get here.

kieren said...

I must second Stephanie Joy and say that I, too, LOVE posts when you share real things about yourself. You should do it more often, and you most definitely DO NOT sound like a wah-wah baby. You sound quite charming, truth be told. I didn't even move to SLC from abroad... just from NYC, and it was such a culture shock, at first I felt like breaking down and crying nearly all the time. I missed my old life, and didn't know what to do with myself here. I can't even imagine moving all the way from Spain... I bet you just ache all the time. I'm sorry. But, things finally got better for me. It took awhile, but it did happen. And now? I love this city. With all the weird, creepy old polygamous mansions in the aves, and the early 1900s buildings downtown that are probably haunted as hell. And the best part about SLC is the amazing friends I've made here. Sometimes it breaks my heart how kind and wonderful my friends are. I love having you here. Selfish of me! But I am so glad you are here! And one day you will be an eccentric novelist, wearing Edie Beale-ish getups and traveling the world over, I just know it. When that day comes I will offer my services to you as your Personal Butler. You can take me around the world with you, (and Dave... Scott can be his butler) and I'll serve you tea on a tray and press your headscarves.

This comment is way too long. Now I am embarrassed. The first pic of the girl on the bike is SEEEEEEEX bob omb. Now I want to ride a bike, damnit. And live in a J Crew ad.

Rachel said...

@Elizabeth, I'm going to send you links of ideas on how to go to Europe! Thank you for being so nice and commenting! @Kieren I think it would be hard to move from NY because they have bicyclers and amazing things and I love what you said about SLC and even more that you want to press my headscarves. "People who are going to get along really well know it almost as soon as they meet. You spend a little while talking and everyone starts to feel this conviction, you're all equally sure that you're at the beginning of something good. That's how it is when you meet people you're going to be with for a long time."
— Banana Yoshimoto

r o y a l said...

Have you seen the new oil/olive oil/something like that shop in the Gateway? It's over by Urban Outfitters... I saw it the other day while I was killing time there, but I didn't go in... Maybe they'll have awesomeness so you feel more at home... ;)

Rachel said...

Ha! Thanks Whitney! I will have to go there and Tony Caputos, I hear they have a good selection. I look forward to you having your baby boy.

Rachel said...

Whoa! You did have your baby!!! He's adorable!!

mina said...

I know you're never supposed to say this but "I know exactly how you feel". I remember when we decided to take a break from traveling, I was exhausted and happy to buy a house, settle, etc... and thought that I would be less inclined to dreaming about the next adventure. (I also feel like a jerk for talking about my first world problems). I hope we both figure it out :)

Anyway, everyone bikes in Montreal. Move here, and we can go on bike rides together! But I don't look as sexy on a bike as the people in your photos.

Rachel said...

@Mina I'm so glad you are going to France and Morocco! I want to come!! I had just hoped that after Spain I'd move somewhere by the coast like Seattle or Portland, Maine, but we didn't plan right and ran out of money. I'm grateful that I got to live in Europe, but I had hight hopes of taking the train from Portland to Montreal to visit. I still want to come to Montreal though and my Mom still works at Delta.

Marisa said...

While I don't know exactly how you feel, I can certainly relate to these kinds of feelings. Well said and don't feel bad. We all have our own lives to live and no matter what you do, someone will always be suffering more then you and at the same time less then you. Travel is my life too, I do it as often as possible and I work at a small travel company. I feel guilty sometimes too, that I could be doing something more philanthropic, but I'm going to keep doing what I am doing and you should too! Just be a good human and enjoy life!

Rachel said...

@Marisa. Thank you for your wise words, seriously! Also, your Antarctica pictures are amazing! You have the best job ever. Is Southern Explorations hiring?

jendar said...

I wish I would have known you were living now in slc! I was just there last week for rachel hunt's wedding! I was also staying close to the genealogy center, meaning that I was close to you. oh well. anyway, I like slc, but like you mentioned I wish people walked and rode their bikes more. I walked everywhere while I was there. I even walked 45 minutes to go to a bikram yoga studio and it was awesome! I love walking. I also love europe, and no matter how cool slc gets, it will never be as cool as madrid. the end.

Marisa said...

Antarctica is incredible. Add it to your list! My job is sweet... work hard, play hard. Spain is one of my favorite countries, I feel your pain leaving it. Maybe someday I will live there :)

L.B. said...

I miss you, little hop-hop. I want you to hitchhike to my house. I'll leave the light on.

modestmuse said...

Rachel! I just read this post. I am so sorry for you; no you are not spoiled, these are your feelings and I think I understand where you're coming from. We've been here in Botswana for nearly 7 mos. and I still think about Buenos Aires every single day and miss it so much. It has such a European feel to it that all of the things you are describing missing -- the convenience and proximity of stores, and also the fact that they close early and on holidays -- the foods, the people, the charm, etc. It is painful to have left it and not know when/if we'll ever go back. I only want to go there to live the rest of my life (ok I know I am being unrealistic!) but funny enough, Neil, who has traveled Spain, keeps telling me we should try to go there next -- he says "If you loved Buenos Aires so much, you'll love Spain." Your memories and pics that you share here make it seem so. Oh, and I still have tons of pics from BsAs, yes, from a year ago now, that I am so tempted to post ... keep your memories flowing but I hope you can get over it enough to enjoy where you are and the people around you. That is what I keep trying to tell myself. Hugs!